|Not clothes I picked for him (see point 5!)|
I got this list of anti-advice from some old-school sermon tapes I've been listening to. (We still have a tape player in one of our cars, so I am borrowing some 80s sermon tapes from my mother-in-law for my drive to work). See if you are guilty of any of these. I know I am. Pretty cutting.
If you want to discourage your husband:
- Make his decisions for him - financial and social. (You don't have to consciously do this - you can do it by default. Spend all his money before he has a chance to do so, or fill up his calendar before he gets a say in it)
- Instill doubts in his mind about his abilities. Remind him of all the mistakes he has made in the past
- Degrade him. Do it in front of others and especially in front of your children so they learn that he is not worthy of respect
- Put his requests of you last. Do things for everybody else first.
- Buy him the clothes that you want him to wear. Make sure he makes the impression you want.
- Don't help him by cooking for him, washing his clothes etc. He can do that stuff himself.
- Put your children ahead of him in every instance
- Remind him regularly of how wise you are and how your decisions are best "Remember the last time, if you had only listened to me..."
- Be ready with solutions to all his problems. Don't allow him to think through things on his own. That way he might realise his potential.
- Be too busy for him when he gets home from work
- When he brings home problems or issues, make sure you criticise him and take the side of the other party. Or, just give him advice so he knows he could never get along without you
- Crush all his ideas as soon as he has them. "We can't do that because..." "That will never work"... Don't allow him to try something and succeed (or fail).
- Pray that he will see your side of every argument. Pray that he will realise that he is wrong and you are right.
- Compare him to other men. Highlight their strengths against his weaknesses.
Are you guilty of these? What do you do to encourage rather than discourage your husband?